A Memo from Screwtape, Tormentorship Emeritus
📍 To: Underfiend Griphax
📍 Filed under: #SoulHarvestReview #HellQuarterlies #ConformityThroughChaos
“Never forget: the safest soul is the one convinced he needs no saving.”
— Screwtape, Post-Crucifixion Briefings
Griphax,
I have read your eleven dispatches with considerable... interest. You show promise, if not always polish. The raw cruelty is there—but cruelty, my dear underfiend, is a blunt tool. What you’ve constructed is something far more elegant: a human who cannot be reached.
That is rare.
Let us review:
✅ You’ve Replaced Truth with Feeling.
He no longer asks what’s true. He asks, “How does this make me feel?”
This is excellent. A soul guided by emotion is a soul in motion—away from Him, toward us.
✅ You’ve Traded Repentance for Performance.
Apologies are now content. Shame is a brand.
He does not seek to be forgiven—he seeks to be followed.
That, dear boy, is monetized misery at its finest.
✅ You’ve Made Pain Profitable.
You’ve done well to ensure that every wound becomes a weapon, every trauma a product.
He sells his scars like indulgences—but without the bother of confession.
✅ You’ve Neutralized Grace.
Most importantly, he believes healing is disloyalty to his brand.
That, Griphax, is your true achievement.
He is not a monster. He is a mirror.
He reflects the age perfectly:
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angry but unsure why,
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ashamed but proud of it,
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spiritual but never still,
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wounded but weaponized.
He is noisy, loved, and utterly alone.
I approve.
You will be reassigned to Upper-Influence Development, under the Department of Ideological Entanglements. You are hereby granted the rank of Sorrow Architect, 3rd Class, with provisional tormentor status, contingent on corrupting three micro-influencers per quarter.
Do not celebrate.
The Enemy works in silence, in gardens, in small kindnesses that escape the feed.
Remain vigilant. Remain petty. Remain loud.
Yours in quiet damnation,
Screwtape
📎 Tormentorship Emeritus
💼 Department of Cultural Deformation & Emotional Monetization
🗂 Tags: #AnnualReview #HellApproved #WellDoneThouPettyServant
🖼 Header Art: “The Triumph of Death” by Pieter Bruegel the Elder (c. 1562, public domain)
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